THE UNIVERSAL CONSPIRACY AGAINST EVERYTHING
Subject: Re: alt.folklore.urban Frequently Asked Questions [Part 3 of 4]
Date: Tue, 28 Feb 1995 09:02:59 GMT
An old friend of mine, Joe Bethancourt, gave me permission to post this
little item
that he wrote up. (You’d better appreciate this, I typed it
in BY HAND.)
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THE
UNIVERSAL CONSPIRACY AGAINST EVERYTHING
********** A pocket guide to paranoiac thinking
**********
-The Whyte Bard
After a lot of reading within the
"Conspiracy Theory of History" folk
of all stripes and flavors, I have drawn up
this little chart showing
"The Universal Conspiracy Against Everything." Since most
of these folks
don’t seem to agree on much, I have done my best to chart it -all,- both
a connection to
-anything-. EVERYTHING in here has been listed, at one time
or another, by some group or
another, as a "conspiratorial" group.
The Devil
|
|——|—Cain——|———————Indo-Europeans
| | | |
| Arabs Biblical
Giants——-Hittites—–|
| | | | |
| | Babylonian Mystery Religion Sun-Worshippers
| | | | | | | Pagans
Blacks | |—|—Merovingians |——–Hindus
|
| | | | | | | | |
| | The Protocols of the Elders of Zion OTO
| | | | | | | |
|
| | | | | | | The Yellow Peril |
| | The Illuminatti–| | | | |
| | | | |
|–|–|-Santa Claus——-Elves
|–|—|-The Ismailians—| | | | |
| | | | | Fu Manchu
| |
| | |—|-Rosicrucians-|–|———Elvis Satanism
| | | | | | | |—-| | |
|
Shriners| |—Catholics | | | | |
| | | | | Easter | Space The
| |—Masons | Cathars
Bunny | Aliens—–Pope
| | | | | | | | |
| |—-Templars———| | | Rock |
|
| || | | The |—–and Proctor
| Mormons || Carbonari Media–| |-Roll and
| | || | | | |
| Gambel Inc
| Girl Scouts| Protestants | TIME | | |
| | || | | Inc. |
Evolutionists——Science
| | |—The Hell-Fire Club | | | | | |
| | | | |
Theosophy—Free Love–Golden Dawn |
| YWCA/YMCA | Country | | | Mad
| | | Music EST
Hippies Smurfs Scientists
Turks | | | | | | |
| ||–The World Bank Foreigners |
Scientology |
| || | | | Harvey | | |
| The UN—–Communists Facists Krishnas | |
Computer
| | | | | | | | Nerds
| The Military/Industrial GM/Ford TM |—–Thelema | |
| | | | Crown of England UFOs | | | |
| Eastern Liberal
Establishment | | | Your Great-Aunt Tillie
| | | | Republicans | | | | |
| The Medical
Establishment | Science Fiction–|—–|–Cthulhu
| | | | EEC | | | |
| The Psychiatric
Establishment | | | Women’s Lib |
| | | | | Gurus | New York
| Homosexuals | Nazi Pagans
| | |–Atheists—-| City
| | | Identity—-| |——–New Agers-| | |
|—-NAACP |
Movement | | | | |-Abortionists |
Black | | Bar coding BBSes | | |
Muslims | California
| | | Neo- Criminals San
NEA—Liberals—Ecologists–Yuppies | Pagans | Francisco
| | |
| | | | |
Moonies |–Animal Rights–|———-Wicca—–Renaissance |
| | |
Faires——–|
New World Order Anybody not in your sect—–| |
| | |—-non "KJV
onlys"
|———-THE BEAST 666 ARMAGEDDON
(When your sect goes to Heaven,
and all the rest of them go to
Hell. Nyahh! Nyahh!)
(NOTE: to those of an
excitable nature, the preceding is a SATIRE.
It is NOT INTENDED TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY! OK?
Reprint rights are
granted. Send a copy c/o PO Box 35190, Phoenix AZ 85069.)
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As I said,
typed in by hand, verbatim. All spellings as in the
original. Thanks, Joe!
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