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Sterno Bombs
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Today boys and girls we will tell you all about having fun
with a few
simple items that you can buy easily or may even have in your home.
Since
most of you are simple-minded, uncoordinated morons, I will start
you out slowly and simply
(like you).
Our first project is a sure fire way to be the life of the party. Real
sure
fire. This item is called a "Handy House Warmer." All you need are
three items which
can easily be obtained. The first item is a roll of
electrical tape (starts easy). Second, a
large can of Sterno, easily
bought at any camping or hardware store. Third, an M-80 or other
similar
explosive plaything.
Step one in the construction of our pyrotecnic wonder is to
remove the top
of the sterno and, using an ice pick or other sharp item, punch a hole in
the top of the can. Step two is placing the M-80 into the sterno gel.
Make sure it is well
covered by the gel. Step three is to replace the
cap, making sure to thread the M-80 fuse
through the hole in the cap.
After securing the lid tightly on the can, you can start the
final phase
to fun. The last step is simply to wind tape tightly around the entire
can,
making sure to cover it completely with at least three layers of tape
but not more than six
layers.
Now, as you can tell, when you go to use our incendiary toy to cheaply and
efficiently heat any home in your neighborhood, all you have to do is
light the fuse and run.
The other advantages of this are that Sterno
sticks to almost anything and is very difficult
to put out, needing to be
completely smothered, and that Sterno is highly prone to reignition
(very
similar to napalm). This type of firecracker is handy in small areas such
as
inside cars, small rooms, phone booths, rectums, etc…
Now, I am not advocating the use of
this item for anything but your own
personal fireworks displays and enjoyment, but where and
what you call
enjoyment I won’t judge.
Well, boys and girls, that’s all for today. Hope
you enjoyed our time
together and remember my motto: DEATH IS JUST A STATE OF MIND.
New for the ACB 5 -=={ RFLAGG }==-
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