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Dirty Old Men

If you know some jerk who’s a terminal lecher, not just a dirty old man, but a truly, grossly obnoxious swine, the following is a sure-fire method that’s right on target. You need either three or four associates, depending on whether you personally want to go into the field on this one. One of your associates must be a comely young lady.

The drill goes like this. The mark is told about the young lady. She is described as being either an unfaithful wife or a hot-to-trot daughter, depending on the age and circumstance. The mark is told she has eyes and everything else for him, and that if he wants to have a lot of heavy action, you or an associate will make the introduction.

As you approach the fateful house on the evening decided upon, you or your associate, acting as a “guide,” must stress that the husband or father is a fiery and jealous man and that she takes you on as a secret lover because of insatiable lust, etc. Build up both the sexual suspense and the thrill of the forbidden. You have to get his adrenaline and imagination cooking really well.

The mark and his guide are at the door and the sweet young thing opens it and moans out a greeting. She should be dressed–or undressed–in the appropriate fashion. The mark should have just enough time to wet his lips and survey her architectural lines. About the time his eyes bug is time for the next act.

Instantly, a large man comes roaring around the corner of the house, bellowing in rage about the honor of his wife or daughter. The guide screams in shrill terror, “Run! Run like hell! It’s the husband [or father]!”

As the mark and guide start to dash away, a couple of shots are fired, and the guide falls. As he falls, he screams to the mark, “Jesus, keep running! He’s killed me!” Another shot rings out; then all is silent.

All is not really silent. The mark’s heart is probably thudding against his chest like a caged elephant. It’s a great idea to carry on with this scenario for a few days, with you or another conspirator, who has been undercover, keeping the mark apprised of the guide’s condition from the supposed gunshot wound. It would also be good to float the rumor that the father or husband is spending all his time looking for “the other bastard who got away.”

The mark won’t stop his fearful shakes long enough to wonder why the police haven’t arrested the husband or father. Maybe, when he does come to this logical question, he will call the police and ask for protection. This scam turns a lot of corners before the mark finally realizes that he’s been had. The police probably won’t be as amused as you are, but you’ll not know about that. The mark will.

If you know the right street people, and if you’re going into dirty tricks you must know them, you will have trickster access to ladies with social diseases. Some of the veterans of the streets will help you out between treatments for a price. Younger, less-experienced ladies don’t know they have the diseases, but their pimp or madam does. Think how much fun it would be if you could hire one of these venereal versions of Typhoid Mary to dazzle, pick up, and seduce your mark. This scam has been pulled off successfully by at least four people I know personally. It is not that hard if you plan, bargain, and buy ahead.

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